he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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