When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
