i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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