So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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