I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
