i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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