That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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