Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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