This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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