I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
