A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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