I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize