So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Randomize
