btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
