Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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