what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
