Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
