He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
