the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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