I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
