Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Help. Why am I so naked?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
