so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
the day after is always just damage control
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
