Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
not ubering you a puppy
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
