Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
