No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize
