At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
