just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
