Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
