Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
