I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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