i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
