The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize