Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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