i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
