yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
