a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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