Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
