Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
how do flat chested girls get laid?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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