i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
