$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
