She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
