We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
