No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
