okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize