no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
