$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize