And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I am never drinking with the goths again.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
