He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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