just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
