redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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