It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i just sent this text using only my big toe
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
