you guys were way drunker than both of me
home. puking in laundry basket.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
mondays should just be called national damage control day
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
