You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
