Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
COCAINE IS GR8
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
