and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
